God is the only constant in this life.

My grandmother recently passed away after a long, painful struggle to fight off cancer that had invaded most of her body. I’m torn between feelings of sadness because she’s gone and this is really the first death close to me, but also of feelings of relief because she’s finally at peace, no longer in pain, but most importantly, with God in Heaven. On the day of her memorial service, my beautiful Godmother gave me a book called Jesus Calling by Sarah Young. If you haven’t heard of it (which I hadn’t), it’s devotions for every day of the year. There is also a free iPhone app and an iPhone app for $9.99! They’re all beautiful, but yesterday’s devotion really spoke to me, so I decided to share it with y’all.

Come to me continually. I am meant to be the Center of your consciousness, the Anchor of your soul. Your mind will wander from Me, but the question is how far you allow it to wander. An anchor on a short rope lets a boat drift only slightly before the taut line tugs the boat back toward the center. Similarly, as you drift away from Me, My Spirit within you gives a tug, prompting you to return to Me. As you become increasingly attuned to My Presence, the length of rope on your soul’s Anchor is shortened. You wander only a short distance before feeling that inner tug — telling you to return to your true Center in Me.
Hebrews 6:19; 1 John 2:28; Matthew 22:37

It’s easy to get caught up in the distractions of every day life as things change around you and life moves forward. But one thing will never change: the love God has for you. God is the only constant in this life. Everyone is going to have their own various daily activities to focus on, but the key is to always come back to your faith; come back to God. Some times it is easier than others. For myself, my faith is what keeps me centered. There are times that my faith unfortunately takes a backseat, but I can always find my way back. For every time I do venture away, my life becomes unbalanced and seems impossible, and I feel that tug to come back to my center, to my faith. Suddenly, everything seems that much easier. Anything is possible with just a little faith.

I am proudly Catholic. At one point in my life, however, I felt I couldn’t share this information about myself with anyone, simply because of the preconceived notions people seem to have about Catholics and the Catholic faith. There were times that I was even shamed for being Catholic or not the right kind of Catholic, which sadly resulted in my leaving the Church for some time. That has really changed for me. I realized that my whole life, values, beliefs, everything seemed to be based off of the Catholic faith. It took leaving to recognize this about myself. I understand some things we do are confusing, and different, but there is a reason! Every day, I become more and more comfortable sharing my faith with people, and I’m hoping to share with y’all as well.

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Oh HEY. I’m a nursing student!

Yeah you read that correctly. I’m officially one week into my first semester of nursing school! And this is what I’m already dealing with…

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You are seeing that correctly. Five books for a five-week summer session. One is so big that I swear it weighs more than a small child. So far my schedule hasn’t been too hectic, but I have a very strong feeling that will be changing in September when the Fall semester begins. It’s daunting. There are no words. [I know someone who recently graduated. She told me her friend ended up in the hospital with heart palpitations because of the stress! OMGOSH.]

Somehow I always forget how much better writing out thoughts/feelings/mindless rambles makes me feel. I don’t understand myself sometimes. Does that even make any sense? I feel like I’m always saying that; sorry! But it’s true. I just keep forgetting. I’m definitely going to try to post at least once a week. Something interesting is bound to happen that doesn’t break any confidentiality laws. I’ve been trying to find a way to make sure I hold myself to this promise. Any ideas?

Well on the first day of class, we were asked to state what our worst fears were going into nursing school. Mine was that I’m afraid I’m going to be terrible at everything and just fail. I get that they wanted us to bond and whatever, but was a conversation about self-doubt really necessary on the  f i r s t  day? I don’t think so. But then I saw something on Instagram that made everything seem a little less worrisome…

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How perfect is that? I have faith in God’s glorious plan for me. I’m confident that nursing school is the destiny He set out for me. But doubt is the Devil’s plaything. I just have to remind myself that if this isn’t what He wants for me, then life will change, and I have to be okay with that. I have the support of some amazing Godly people who will help me when changes seem impossible. So for now, my motto is this: Just have faith. I think I can manage that one.

inspiration // “Those whose steps are guided by the Lord, whose ways God approves, may stumble, but they will never fall, for the Lord God holds their hand.” ~ Psalm 37:23-24

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Senior Year. Final Semester. Week One.

DAY ONE:

I woke up with high hopes of getting everything I wanted out of my final semester at Texas A&M University. Oh how my dreams would soon dwindle. My first two classes, being in the same lecture room, were mostly uneventful, minus the realization that one of my profs was going to be a cocky S.O.B. and the fact that this lecture hall is underneath our stadium, and thus, extremely difficult to find (AKA first challenge). Then came my third class, and my second challenge. I was going to have to all but sprint across almost the entire length of campus in twenty minutes to make it in time. By the grace of God, I made it. Relief waved over me briefly, then my prof walked in. I have heard stories… But I have never experienced her teaching techniques first hand. Oh boy. I make it through the class, barely, and delight in the fact that I have a short break to get a snack and coffee before I head to my next challenge: getting forced into a yoga class. When the instructor arrives, I ask to speak with her. I explain my whole situation about being a graduating senior and being forced into two other classes that meant I had to drop another kinesiology class and that I couldn’t get into another so would she pretty please force me into hers. She said to stay for class and email her afterwards to remind her so she could see about forcing me in. I did that. But then I made the mistake of sending a second email telling her that I had a backup plan. Sure, sure, this sounds like the nice thing to do…

DAY TWO:

NOPE. I get an email the next morning (day two) from her, telling me that she would not be letting anyone into her class. I accepted defeat and went online to try to find another kinesiology class. To my surprise, I find that she’s actually forced an extra person into all but one of her yoga classes. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?! I am seeing red at this point. I do the right thing, and where does that get me? Put in an 8am aerobic walking class. Gee, thanks. That’s super. The rest of the day is mostly uneventful. I bought some shoes and dividers and organized. I also ended up submitting my applications to five nursing programs. I had so much tension about that. But as soon as I did it and knew that it was out of my hands, this huge weight was lifted off of my shoulders. It could not have come at a better time. Especially since I had to wake up at 6:30am the next morning for aerobic walking. Ugh.

DAY THREE:

So far so good. I woke up on time. Got to class on time. The aerobic walking instructor is nice. I’m wearing my new shoes. I had time to get an extra hot vanilla latte. I saw my friend and amazing microbiology lab partner from last semester. Now I’m sitting on the floor waiting for my class in 30 minutes.

So basically the first two days were kind of a bust for me. Believe me, I wanted so badly to give up last night and just drink myself into a stupor. But I didn’t. Thankfully, I have God on my side, so I know that He will only put me in situations that He knows I can handle. Without that… there would be definite wine stupor.
I would really like to make my blog more attractive. If anyone out there is reading this, could you recommend a good blog/graphic designer? I would much appreciate it. Mind you, I am a poor college student, so I can’t break the bank on this. But if they’re good, I would invest.
xoxo!
Robyn